Today I was punched in the eye by Laura's cat. Hence the teeny tiny black eye. Granted it was probably my fault for sticking my face right near hers but still. Ouch. The day did not improve from here, it has to be said. Mother, I'd stop reading now. Please.
Penis
Lol haha willy
Lmao big spunky chode
Hmm motorboarding...
This was the point at which I, in bold, realised that I wasn't actually texting Laura, as I'd assumed, I was actually texting my BOSS. This would probably explain my confusion as to how Laura was texting me back whilst still playing LA Noire. Anyway I texted back with this:
Omg! Those were meant for my friend Laura!!! Now I'm embarrassed! Major apologies! x
And I got this in return:
Lol I just found it very funny! It's cool :) xx
Thank God for a good working relationship. I doubt the editor of The Guardian would find it as funny. Yikes.
This post has done nothing to quash the cat lady rumours. Not that there were any...
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